走路— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be clearer and more concise. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Fix grammar (verb forms, word order) and avoid repetition. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas.

範例: Yes, I walk a lot, especially in the morning. My commute to work takes about 20 minutes on foot, so I usually walk every day because it helps me wake up and is good exercise. Additionally, walking saves money on transport.

建議: Answer directly and organize reasons with linking words. Reduce fillers (uh, um) and use past tense consistently. Provide one clear reason, then a specific example to support it.

範例: Not really. As a child I rarely went for walks because I spent most of my free time playing cricket with friends. Also, I had a lot of homework from school, so I usually stayed home to study.

建議: Be concise and precise. Begin with a topic sentence, then give two specific reasons using linking words (for example, 'because' and 'also'). Use correct comparative forms and avoid repetition.

範例: People like walking in parks because they are safer and less busy than streets. For example, families often choose parks since there is little traffic and children can play freely, so it’s a pleasant place to relax together.

建議: Use a clear conditional opening and then give specific details. Improve sentence flow with linking words ('because', 'so', 'for example') and correct vocabulary ('bushwalks', 'scenery'). Limit to 3–4 sentences.

範例: If I had the chance, I would go for long bushwalks in the Wellington region. Those walks usually last two to three hours and I enjoy them because the air is fresh and the scenery is very green; I often take photos and sometimes spot native birds and other wildlife.

建議: Give a complete, concise answer with correct past tense and specific details (who, where, what you saw). Remove hesitations and finish the sentence with an example or result.

範例: Lately we went for a walk at Panadura Beach. My family and I walked along the shore, enjoyed the sand under our feet, and saw several small fishing boats and a group of seabirds near the water.

× Yes I do walk a lot especially in the morning.

✓ Yes, I walk a lot, especially in the morning.

The auxiliary 'do' is unnecessary for a simple affirmative present tense statement. Use the simple present 'I walk' to state habitual actions. Add commas for clarity.

× My home to my workplace is like 20 minutes walking.

✓ It takes me about 20 minutes to walk from my home to my workplace.

The original lacks a proper verb and natural English word order. Use 'it takes me' + time expression and the infinitive 'to walk' to indicate duration of travel.

× So all morning when I go to more work 2:00 in the morning I always work walk to the work.

✓ So every morning when I go to work at around 2:00 I always walk to work.

The original has word order errors and unnecessary words ('more', repeated verbs). Use 'every morning', place time expression 'at around 2:00' correctly, and use the single verb 'walk to work'.

× So it was quite fun and it's a good exercise as well.

✓ It is quite fun and a good exercise as well.

Maintain consistent present tense when describing a habitual activity. Mixing past 'was' with present 'is' is inconsistent. Use present 'is'.

× Is wake me wake me up as well.

✓ It wakes me up as well.

The sentence lacked a subject and used incorrect verb form. Use 'it wakes me up' (third-person singular) to describe the effect. No reflexive pronoun is needed.

× Gives a lot of time and cheap.

✓ It saves a lot of time and is cheap.

The verb is missing a subject and proper verb; 'cheap' needs to be linked with 'is' or 'it's'. Use 'saves a lot of time' to convey efficiency.

× Uh, when I was a child, not really, uh, we didn't go to walk too much and, but we used to play a lot of cricket and, uh, at that time because of that, uh, we didn't go a lot of walking.

✓ When I was a child, not really. We did not walk much, but we used to play a lot of cricket, so we did not go walking often.

Combine clauses for clarity and use correct past forms: 'did not walk' and 'used to' for habitual past actions. Remove awkward phrases like 'go a lot of walking'.

× And also because of the, umm, education in the school, I had a lot of homework.

✓ Also, because of school, I had a lot of homework.

Simplify phrasing: 'because of the education in the school' is unnatural. Use 'because of school' and keep past tense 'had'.

× I did not have time to go in walking.

✓ I did not have time to go walking.

The preposition 'in' is unnecessary. Use the gerund 'go walking' without 'in'.

× People like to walk in parks, people because especially the families with the children, they think it's really safe because it's not quite traffic as well, traffic jams and it's quite more safer and also quite playful as well.

✓ People like to walk in parks, especially families with children, because they think it is safe, there is less traffic and fewer traffic jams, and the parks are more playful.

Remove repeated words and restructure the sentence. Use 'fewer' with countable 'traffic jams', 'less' with uncountable 'traffic', and avoid redundant adverbs. Simplify phrase 'quite more safer' to 'safer' or 'more safe' (prefer 'safer').

× They can enjoy as a family.

✓ They can enjoy themselves as a family.

Use the reflexive pronoun 'themselves' after 'enjoy' to show the subject benefits. 'Enjoy as a family' is understandable but less natural.

× If I have a chance, uh, we always go in Wellington, Wellington region, there's a lot of bushwalks.

✓ If I had the chance, I would go to the Wellington region; there are a lot of bushwalks there.

The question asked a hypothetical ('Where would you like... if you had the chance?'), so use the second conditional: 'If I had the chance, I would...' Also correct prepositions ('go to') and use 'there are' for existence.

× So it's quite take like 2 to 3 hour walks.

✓ So they typically take about 2 to 3 hours to walk.

Fix verb structure and time expression: use 'take about 2 to 3 hours' and plural 'hours' for duration.

× So I like to go those walks inside the bushes because it's with the nature is quite fresher and the greenery things.

✓ So I like to go on those walks in the bush because the air is fresher and there is a lot of greenery.

Use natural collocations: 'go on walks', 'in the bush', 'air is fresher', and 'a lot of greenery'. Remove awkward 'it's with the nature' and 'greenery things'.

× I take a lot of photos and the videos and can see the lot of, uh, animals.

✓ I take a lot of photos and videos and can see many animals.

Use parallel nouns 'photos and videos' without 'the', and use 'many' for countable 'animals'. Keep present simple for habitual action.

× Uh, lately we went to the, uh, beach, uh, the Panadura beach and we was walking in the beach and is, I like The Walking in the sand as well And, uh, seeing all the, uh, umm, when we was walking in the beach, we saw the, uh.

✓ Lately we went to Panadura Beach and we were walking on the beach. I like walking on the sand as well. While we were walking, we saw some animals.

Use past tense 'were' for past continuous (we were walking). Use correct preposition 'on the beach' and 'walking on the sand'. Replace 'we was' with 'we were' and complete the sentence with a plausible noun 'some animals' to correct sentence fragment.