建筑— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct noun/verb forms, and avoid repetition. Use one or two supporting details with linking words. For example, say where you live, the typical building height, and why there are no tall buildings.

範例: I live in a small rural town, so there aren’t any tall buildings nearby. Most houses are only one or two storeys, and the area is mostly farmland and low-density housing.

建議: Clarify your meaning and use correct verbs and linking words. Give a direct topic sentence (Yes/No), then add specific reasons or examples. Avoid unclear phrases and repetition.

範例: Sometimes I photograph buildings, especially when they are large or architecturally interesting. For example, I took pictures of the old city hall last year because of its ornate facade and size.

建議: Use smoother sentence structure and be specific about reasons. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add details (why, when, what you expect). Use linking words like because and so.

範例: Yes, I would like to visit the New York Tower because I’ve never been to that city and I’m interested in its history and views. If I have the chance in the next few years, I’d like to tour the building and take photographs of the skyline.

建議: Be direct and more fluent. Start with a clear opinion, then give two concise reasons connected by linking words. Correct phrasing (e.g., 'on the second or third floor') and avoid filler words.

範例: No, I wouldn’t want to live in a very tall building. I prefer a smaller building and would choose the second or third floor because I feel safer and less anxious about emergencies such as earthquakes or fires.

× I live in a small town, it's a rural community and we had only a small buildings like 2 Storey and two Storey buildings near at my garden place.

✓ I live in a small town; it's a rural community and we had only small buildings like two-storey buildings near my garden.

Plural noun usage: 'a small buildings' mixes singular article 'a' with plural 'buildings'. Use either 'a small building' or 'small buildings'. Also '2 Storey and two Storey' is redundant and numerals should be written consistently as 'two-storey buildings'. Remove unnecessary preposition 'at' after 'near'. Use punctuation to separate clauses. Suggestion: choose singular or plural consistently and write compound adjectives with a hyphen (two-storey).

× ...near at my garden place.

✓ ...near my garden.

The preposition 'at' is unnecessary after 'near'. 'Near' already indicates proximity and should be followed by a noun phrase without 'at'. Also 'garden place' is unnatural; use 'garden'. Suggestion: use 'near my garden' or 'near my house'.

× I think it depends to the specific area.

✓ I think it depends on the specific area.

Incorrect preposition after 'depends': the correct collocation is 'depend on', not 'depend to'. Use present simple 'depends on' for general statements. Suggestion: memorize common verb-preposition pairs (depend on, rely on).

× If the building is small I don't know about take any photos,

✓ If the building is small I don't take photos,

Incorrect use of 'about' and infinitive: 'know about take' is ungrammatical. For habitual actions, use simple present 'I don't take photos'. If you want to express uncertainty use 'I don't know whether to take photos'. Suggestion: choose either 'I don't take photos' or 'I don't know whether to take photos'.

× but if the vicinity is wide as well as bigger than the ordinary building I like taking photos so I have the the kiss me more of the specific place.

✓ but if the vicinity is wide and the building is larger than ordinary ones, I like taking photos because I want to capture more of the specific place.

Multiple issues: 'as well as' is awkward here; use 'and' to join conditions. 'Bigger than the ordinary building' should be 'larger than ordinary ones' for correct comparison and plural reference. 'so I have the the kiss me more' is nonsensical; likely intended 'so I want to capture more'. Use 'because' to show reason. Suggestion: simplify sentence structure and use clear causal connectors ('because', 'so that').

× I would like to visit a building called the New York Tower because I haven't been to that specific area and place.

✓ I would like to visit a building called New York Tower because I haven't been to that area.

Article use: 'the New York Tower' may be acceptable if 'New York Tower' is a proper name without 'the'. Also 'that specific area and place' is redundant; use 'that area' or 'that place'. Suggestion: drop redundant words and use correct article with proper names (no article for many building names).

× Hopefully in the future to come I can able to visit that historic place in that state of New York.

✓ Hopefully in the future I will be able to visit that historic place in New York State.

Redundant and incorrect modal construction: 'I can able' mixes 'can' and 'able' incorrectly. Use 'will be able to' to express future possibility. 'in the future to come' is redundant; use 'in the future' or 'in the future'. Use 'New York State' or 'New York' instead of 'that state of New York'. Suggestion: use 'I hope' or 'hopefully' with 'will be able to'.

× Honestly, I prefer to live in a small building like in uh, like staying in the second or third floor, unlike to live in the tallest building or big building.

✓ Honestly, I prefer to live in a small building, like on the second or third floor, rather than in the tallest or a very large building.

Preposition for floors is 'on' not 'in' for 'floor'. Use 'rather than' to contrast preferences, not 'unlike to live'. Also article use: 'the tallest building or big building' is awkward; use 'the tallest building or a very large building'. Suggestion: use 'on the second floor' and 'rather than' for clear contrast.

× I feel uncomfortable and a little bit scared because I keep thinking about if something happened like earthquake and other disasters event and then I live in the big building.

✓ I feel uncomfortable and a little scared because I keep thinking about what would happen if something like an earthquake or another disaster occurred and I were living in a tall building.

Tense and conditional form: 'I keep thinking about if something happened' should be 'I keep thinking about what would happen if something like an earthquake occurred'. Use past subjunctive 'were' or conditional 'if... occurred' for hypothetical situations. 'other disasters event' is incorrect; use 'another disaster' or 'other disasters'. 'the big building' should be 'a tall building' to match earlier contrast. Suggestion: use conditional structures ('what would happen if...') and correct noun phrases ('an earthquake', 'another disaster').