旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: ・質問に直接答えている点は良いですが、表現が不自然で繰り返しが多いです。1文目で簡潔に答え、その後で理由や具体例を追加してください。・語順や形容詞の使い方（"love beautiful"ではなく"love beautiful scenery/environment"）を直し、不要な繰り返し（"lift my mood"が二回）を避けましょう。・接続語（for example, because, so）を使って理由付けを明確にし、文を2〜4文に収めてください。

範例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by bus or car because I enjoy watching the passing scenery. For example, seeing trees and old buildings helps me relax and lifts my mood. I often find it refreshing to watch people going about their day.

建議: ・答えは明確ですが、不自然な表現（"feel on by all my eyes"）や文の切れ目が不適切です。"I usually don't take photos"の理由を簡潔に述べ、代わりに何をするかを付け加えると良いです。・Fillers（uh）を減らし、文をつなぐ接続語（because, so, instead）を使って論理的に話してください。・語彙を具体的にして、なぜ写真を撮らないのか（感覚的な理由や集中したい等）を説明しましょう。

範例: No, I usually don't take photos of scenery from the car because I prefer to experience it with my own eyes. Instead, I focus on relaxing and remembering the view, which helps me feel calm and present.

建議: ・好みを述べる点は良いですが、文法と語彙のミス（"prefer the mountain to the sea"は可だが自然に"prefer the mountains to the sea"と複数形が好ましい、"I used to live falls to mountain"は意味不明）があります。・理由を一度述べ、具体的な記憶や例（匂い、風景、活動）を一つ付け加えてください。繰り返しを避け、文を2〜3文でまとめましょう。・過去の経験を表すときは"I grew up near the mountains"や"I used to live in the mountains"など明確な表現を使ってください。

範例: I prefer the mountains to the sea because I grew up near them and they feel familiar to me. For instance, I remember hiking with my family and enjoying the fresh air and quiet views, which left a lasting impression on me.

× I usually look out of the window to look at scenery because I love beautiful.

✓ I usually look out of the window to look at the scenery because I love beautiful views.

The adjective 'beautiful' cannot stand alone without a noun here; a noun like 'views' or 'scenery' is required. Also add the definite article 'the' before 'scenery' when referring to specific scenery seen from a window. Suggestion: use 'beautiful views' or 'beautiful scenery' and include 'the' when appropriate.

× I love beautiful environment that helps me lift my mood, lift my mood and I feel relaxed and refreshed.

✓ I love a beautiful environment because it lifts my mood, and I feel relaxed and refreshed.

The sentence has repetition and incorrect structure. Use the article 'a' before 'beautiful environment' and make the verb agree with the singular noun: 'it lifts' not 'that helps me lift'. Combine ideas with 'because' and avoid repeating 'lift my mood'. Suggestion: keep clauses clear and use a single main verb for the subject.

× I usually don't take photos such as scenery, uh mountains and rivers because I would like to feel on by all my eyes.

✓ I usually don't take photos of scenery, such as mountains and rivers, because I like to take it all in with my own eyes.

Use the preposition 'of' with 'photos' (photos of scenery). The phrase 'feel on by all my eyes' is incorrect; the correct idiom is 'take it all in with my own eyes' meaning to observe directly. Also 'I would like to' is better as 'I like to' for habitual action. Suggestion: use 'photos of' and the idiom 'take it all in with my own eyes'.

× This scenery makes me. Feel relaxed.

✓ This scenery makes me feel relaxed.

The original has an incorrect period splitting the sentence and unnecessary capitalization. Combine into a single sentence 'makes me feel relaxed.' Suggestion: avoid incorrect punctuation that breaks sentence flow.

× I prefer the mountain to the sea because I used to live falls to mountain when I was a child.

✓ I prefer the mountains to the sea because I used to live near the mountains when I was a child.

Use plural 'mountains' when comparing mountains in general. The phrase 'live falls to mountain' is incorrect; likely intended 'live near the mountains' or 'lived in the mountains.' Suggestion: use 'near the mountains' or 'in the mountains' for clarity and correct plural form.

× The view from the mountain shaped my childhood and shaped my childhood.

✓ The view from the mountains shaped my childhood.

The sentence repeats the phrase 'shaped my childhood' unnecessarily. Also use plural 'mountains' to match earlier correction. Suggestion: remove repetition and keep a concise statement.