旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Content is relevant and enthusiastic, but there are some grammatical errors, slight redundancy, and a lengthier final sentence that affects naturalness. Improve by making a clear topic sentence, correcting article use (“in Dubai” not “in the Dubai”), simplifying verb tenses, and avoiding unnecessary repetition. Use one or two supporting details with linking words.

範例: Yes, I do. I enjoy looking at interesting buildings and cityscapes when I travel. For example, when I visited Dubai, I rolled down the car window and admired the Burj Khalifa up close, which was an unforgettable sight.

建議: Good clear answer with reasons, but contains awkward phrasing and some grammar mistakes (“having my own vacation”, “all the good things happen”). Make sentences more concise and use linking words (for example, because/so) to connect ideas. Provide one concrete example to make it specific.

範例: Yes, I often take photos when I travel because they help me remember places. For instance, on a recent trip I photographed old streets and cafes so I could look back at those memories later.

建議: The main idea is clear (preference for mountains) but the answer is disfluent, partly repetitive, and contains several errors and unclear words (“mountains on the sea”, sentence fragments, “afraid of chowing”). Improve by giving a direct topic sentence, one concise reason with a linking word, and a brief contrast sentence about the sea. Correct vocabulary (e.g., afraid of the sea or of swimming) and avoid fragments.

範例: I prefer the mountains because I enjoy hiking and the challenge of reaching a summit. In contrast, I don't like the sea because I feel uncomfortable in deep water and I am not a confident swimmer.

× When I was in the Dubai, I just rolled down the window of the car and it's so nice to see the most amazing Burj Khalifa, which is standing just next to me.

✓ When I was in Dubai, I just rolled down the car window and it was so nice to see the amazing Burj Khalifa, which was standing just next to me.

Use of the definite article 'the' before proper country/city names like Dubai is incorrect (Article errors). 'the Dubai' should be 'Dubai'. 'the window of the car' is awkward; native usage is 'the car window' (article/word order). Also tense consistency: the student is recounting a past event, so change 'it's' to 'it was'. 'most amazing' is exaggerated and unnecessary; 'amazing' is sufficient. Suggestion: Remove incorrect article before place names, use natural noun phrases (car window), and keep past tense throughout when describing past events.

× I love taking photos to save that as a memory, especially if I'm going to different cities and towns having my own vacation.

✓ I love taking photos to save them as memories, especially when I travel to different cities and towns on my vacation.

Incorrect use of present participle phrase 'having my own vacation' and pronoun reference (see next). The clause should express the time or condition: use 'when I travel' or 'when I'm on vacation' instead of 'having my own vacation' (Verb in the present participle form). Also 'save that as a memory' has pronoun/number issues; 'photos' -> 'them' and 'a memory' -> 'memories'. Suggestion: Use a finite verb phrase ('when I travel' or 'when I'm on vacation') and match pronouns and number to 'photos'.

× I love taking photos to save that as a memory, especially if I'm going to different cities and towns having my own vacation.

✓ I love taking photos to save them as memories, especially when I travel to different cities and towns on my vacation.

The demonstrative 'that' incorrectly refers to 'photos' (plural), so use 'them'. 'a memory' is singular while 'photos' are plural; use 'memories'. Also 'having my own vacation' is unidiomatic; use 'on my vacation' or 'when I travel'. Suggestion: Ensure pronouns agree in number with their antecedents and use idiomatic time expressions.

× In that way I could browse them easily and just reminisce all the good things happen in my vacation.

✓ In that way I could browse them easily and just reminisce about all the good things that happened on my vacation.

Tense and verb form errors: 'happen' should be past tense 'happened' to match 'could' and the past context (Past tense issue). Also missing preposition 'about' after 'reminisce', and use 'on my vacation' not 'in my vacation'. Suggestion: Keep past tense consistent when recounting past experiences, include necessary prepositions, and use 'on my vacation'.

× I love mountains on the sea.

✓ I love mountains more than the sea.

The phrase 'mountains on the sea' is incorrect preposition use and unclear meaning (Incorrect use of prepositions). The question asked preference between mountains and the sea; express preference with 'more than' or 'I prefer mountains to the sea.' Suggestion: Use 'prefer X to Y' or 'X more than Y' to compare preferences.

× If I'm doing a mountain climbing.

✓ For example, if I'm mountain climbing, it's very challenging and adventurous for me.

The original is a fragment without a complete main clause (Sentence structure errors). 'If I'm doing a mountain climbing.' lacks a result or main clause and 'a mountain climbing' is incorrect article usage and noun form. Use 'mountain climbing' (no 'a') or 'climbing a mountain'. Suggestion: Complete conditional sentences with both clauses and use correct noun forms: 'if I'm mountain climbing' or 'if I climb a mountain' followed by the main clause.

× It's very challenging and very adventurous for me.

✓ It's very challenging and adventurous for me.

Redundant use of 'very' twice is stylistically awkward (Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs). Combine adjectives without repeating the intensifier. Suggestion: Avoid repetitive intensifiers; use one 'very' or stronger adjective if needed.

× On the other hand, I don't like sea simply because I'm afraid of chowing.

✓ On the other hand, I don't like the sea simply because I'm afraid of drowning.

Multiple errors: missing definite article 'the' before 'sea' (Article errors/Incorrect use of pronouns overlap) and incorrect word 'chowing' which is a wrong verb; intended word is 'drowning' (Incorrect use of pronouns/ vocabulary). Use 'afraid of drowning' to express fear of water-related death. Suggestion: Include 'the' before 'sea' when speaking generally about the sea as a concept, and use the correct verb 'drowning'. Also consider 'afraid of the sea' or 'afraid of swimming' depending on intended meaning.