旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and fix verb forms (e.g., 'when I travel').

範例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by bus or car. For example, when I visit other cities or pass through mountainous areas, I enjoy watching the landscape because it helps me relax and notice local features such as farms and rivers.

建議: Improve clarity and vocabulary. Give one clear reason and a specific example. Remove filler words ('uh') and correct phrases ('the view outside'). Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas.

範例: Yes, I often take photos of the view outside, especially from a car or bus, because my hometown has many beautiful coastal scenes. For instance, last summer I took several pictures of the shoreline and sunset while driving along the coast.

建議: Give a clear topic sentence stating your preference and provide two specific reasons supported by brief examples. Remove fillers and fix grammar (e.g., 'since childhood I've often visited the sea'). Use linking words like 'because' and 'for example'.

範例: I prefer the sea because I grew up visiting beaches and find the scenery very calming. For example, since childhood I've spent summers swimming and watching sunsets by the shore, which makes seaside trips more memorable for me.

× I think yes, because usually when we look out of the window when we're traveling by transport, we can see a really amazing view.

✓ I think so, because usually when we look out of the window while we're traveling, we can see really amazing views.

Uses present continuous correctly but small word choice and article issues: 'think yes' is incorrect, use 'think so'. 'When we're traveling by transport' is awkward — 'while we're traveling' is natural. 'a really amazing view' should be plural 'really amazing views' or 'a really amazing view' depending on context; here plural fits better. Suggestion: say 'I think so' and use 'while' for simultaneous actions and consistent plural for general statements.

× If we traveling in another city or the place like we have a mountain.

✓ If we are traveling in another city or in a place that has mountains.

Missing auxiliary 'are' for present continuous: 'we traveling' should be 'we are traveling' (Verb + -ing with auxiliary). Also restructure phrase 'the place like we have a mountain' to 'a place that has mountains' for clarity. Suggestion: use 'we are traveling' and 'a place that has mountains'.

× And usually I think yes, it's really good.

✓ And usually I think so; it's really nice.

'think yes' is nonstandard; use 'think so'. 'Good' is acceptable but 'nice' or 'great' is more natural. Suggestion: replace 'think yes' with 'think so' and use a more natural adjective.

× Yes, I really like to take uh, any photos when I usually look the view in outside you, especially when I'm in the car or a bus, because usually the place where I'm live, we have a really beautiful, uh sunscreen.

✓ Yes, I really like to take photos when I usually look at the view outside, especially when I'm in a car or a bus, because where I live we have really beautiful scenery.

Multiple issues: 'look the view in outside you' needs 'look at the view outside' (preposition error). 'the car or a bus' -> 'a car or a bus' (article). 'the place where I'm live' should be 'where I live' (verb/pronoun order). 'sunscreen' is wrong word; correct is 'scenery'. Also remove 'any' before photos. Suggestion: use 'look at', correct word order 'where I live', and choose the correct noun 'scenery'.

× To be honest, I really love the sea because, uh, from the childhood, I often visit the sea in my country.

✓ To be honest, I really love the sea because, since childhood, I often visit the sea in my country.

Tense and preposition issues: 'from the childhood' is incorrect; use 'since childhood'. 'I often visit' suggests habitual present which is acceptable if visits still occur; keep present simple 'I often visit' or use present perfect 'I have often visited' if referring to experience over time. Suggestion: use 'since childhood' and choose consistent tense.

× So I really love, uh, how can we is a long time, uh, we can show this view and it's really beautiful, amazing.

✓ So I really love it because we can enjoy this view for a long time; it's really beautiful and amazing.

Sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. 'how can we is a long time' has wrong word order and missing words. Rephrase to 'we can enjoy this view for a long time' and connect ideas with 'because' or a semicolon. Also combine adjectives properly. Suggestion: use clear clause structure 'because we can enjoy this view for a long time'.

× Umm, so I think I prefer more sea.

✓ Umm, so I think I prefer the sea.

'prefer more sea' is nonstandard. Use 'prefer the sea' or 'prefer the sea more' if comparing. As a simple statement, 'I prefer the sea' is natural. Suggestion: use 'prefer the sea' or 'prefer the sea more than the mountains' for comparison.