旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Speak more directly and concisely. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid unclear phrases (e.g. “rewind”) and grammar errors (use “transport” or “on the bus/car”, and match singular/plural).

範例: Yes, I often look out of the window when I travel by bus or car. For example, during my commute I enjoy watching streets and parks pass by because the slow rhythm helps me relax. As a result, I usually use that time to unwind and think about my day.

建議: Make the answer grammatically correct and more coherent. Start with a clear statement, then explain with one specific reason and a linking word. Use correct forms (e.g. “scenery” singular/uncountable, “it’s difficult to capture” and remove confusing fragments).

範例: Yes, I sometimes take photos of the scenery from the car window because I’m an amateur photographer. However, it’s difficult to capture good shots since the car is moving quickly, so I usually only take a few blurred pictures or wait until we stop.

建議: Be slightly more concise and use linking words to connect reasons. Correct small errors (use “mountains” not “Mountain View” unless referring to a place) and add a specific example to strengthen the answer.

範例: I prefer the mountains because I enjoy camping and the fresh air. For instance, when I camp I love watching the sunset silhouettes over the ridges, which feels peaceful and refreshing.

× Yes, I often look out the window when I am in the transportation, especially when I need to commute sometimes.

✓ Yes, I often look out the window when I am traveling, especially when I have to commute.

Original uses awkward noun 'transportation' and redundant wording 'need to commute sometimes'. This is a sentence structure and word choice issue. Use the verb 'travel' or 'traveling' instead of 'in the transportation', and simplify 'need to commute sometimes' to 'have to commute' to sound natural and avoid redundancy.

× And the moment when I see the window I can feel rewind and relaxed because of the slow paced and also the sceneries passing by.

✓ When I look out the window I feel relaxed and refreshed because of the slow pace and the scenery passing by.

Problems: incorrect word 'rewind', awkward phrase order, and incorrect adjective forms 'slow paced' and plural 'sceneries'. This is a sentence structure and word choice error. Use 'relaxed and refreshed', 'slow pace' (noun), and 'scenery' (uncountable) for natural expression.

× Yes, as an amateur photographer, sometimes I feel the sceneries from the window is different from I just took a photo on the seat streets and but it's difficult to capture the moment because the car is driving too fast.

✓ Yes, as an amateur photographer, sometimes I feel the scenery from the window is different from what I can capture from a seat, but it's difficult to photograph the moment because the car is moving too fast.

Multiple issues: incorrect plural 'sceneries', wrong clause 'different from I just took a photo on the seat streets', and awkward 'driving too fast'. Classified under incorrect use of pronouns and sentence structure. Use 'scenery' (uncountable), replace the faulty clause with 'what I can capture from a seat', and use 'moving' for the car. Also replace 'photograph' for clarity.

× Personally, I prefer Mountain View because I'm a big fan of camping and I also like the fresh air in the mountains and watch the silhouettes of sunsets and mountain shapes.

✓ Personally, I prefer mountain views because I'm a big fan of camping; I also like the fresh air in the mountains and watching the silhouettes of sunsets and the shapes of the mountains.

Errors: inconsistent capitalization 'Mountain View' (unless a proper noun), incorrect parallel structure 'like ... and watch' should be 'like ... and watching', and awkward phrase 'mountain shapes'. This is an adjective/adverb and sentence structure issue. Use plural 'mountain views' or 'the mountains', maintain parallel gerund forms, and use 'shapes of the mountains' for clarity.