旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and organized: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases (e.g. “scenario views”, “the go, ongoing buses”). Use linking words to connect ideas.

範例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by bus or car. For example, I enjoy watching passing cars and buses and I like observing changes in the landscape, such as parks or rivers, because it helps me relax during the journey.

建議: Make your answer clearer and more specific: give one main reason and one concrete example. Avoid awkward phrasing like “I keep landscape use the scenic views”. Use linking words like “because” and “for example.”

範例: Yes, I often take photos through the car window because I want to remember striking views. For example, last summer I photographed a dramatic sunset over the hills to keep as a memory and later shared it with my family.

建議: Start with a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then give specific reasons with linking words. Avoid redundant phrases and small grammatical errors (e.g. “I would I like”).

範例: I prefer the mountains because I enjoy the quiet atmosphere and expansive views. For instance, I like hiking to look over valleys and breathe fresh air, which helps me relax and recharge.

× Definitely, whenever I am travelling by bus or a car, I look out of the window to enjoy the scenario views, the go, ongoing buses, other buses or the cars that are passing by or the beauty of the nature I enjoy.

✓ Definitely, whenever I am travelling by bus or by car, I look out of the window to enjoy the scenery, the buses that are passing by, other vehicles, or the beauty of nature.

Errors: incorrect article use ('a car' after 'by' should be 'by car'), incorrect noun choice ('scenario views' should be 'scenery'), unnecessary words ('the go, ongoing'), redundant articles ('the cars' and 'the beauty of the nature'). Suggestion: use 'by bus or by car' (no article), replace 'scenario views' with 'scenery', simplify list of items and remove extra articles, and use 'beauty of nature' without 'the'. Keep parallel structure in lists and concise phrasing.

× Yes, I prefer to take the photos outside the car windows to keep it as a memory whenever the view is stunning or I keep landscape use the scenic views or the photos of the other vehicles or the cars I like that are passing by my side.

✓ Yes, I prefer to take photos through the car window to keep them as memories whenever the view is stunning; I also take landscape shots, scenic views, or photos of other vehicles passing by my side.

Errors: incorrect preposition ('outside the car windows' is awkward; 'through the car window' is more natural), wrong pronoun number ('it' should be 'them' to match 'photos'), incorrect verb forms and word order ('I keep landscape use the scenic views' is ungrammatical). Suggestion: use 'take photos through the car window', match pronouns to plural nouns, restructure the sentence into clear coordinated parts, and use parallel noun phrases ('landscape shots, scenic views').

× I am more of a Mountaineer person so I like to go and visit the places at the height.

✓ I am more of a mountaineer, so I like to go and visit high places.

Errors: incorrect capitalisation and article use ('Mountaineer person' is awkward; 'a mountaineer' or 'a mountainous person' would be better), unnatural phrase 'places at the height'. Suggestion: use 'a mountaineer' or simply 'I enjoy mountains' and replace 'places at the height' with 'high places' or 'mountainous areas'. Keep natural collocations and correct capitalization.

× I enjoy the quiet atmosphere and the scenic views from the heights, so I would I like to visit mountains more.

✓ I enjoy the quiet atmosphere and the scenic views from the heights, so I would like to visit mountains more.

Errors: extra word 'I' after 'would' creating redundancy and incorrect word order. Suggestion: remove the extra 'I' to form the correct conditional phrase 'I would like'. The rest of the sentence is fine; ensure correct subject-verb order and avoid repeated pronouns.