自行车— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Ответ понятен, но содержит грамматические ошибки, лишние паузы и повторения. Нужно исправить времена (past simple), убрать лишние слова и сделать фразы более связными. Также полезно добавить одно-два уточняющих предложения с деталями (например, возраст, когда он купил, как вы чувствовали себя), используя связующие слова (so, but, then). Практикуйте короткие, полные предложения и избегайте заполнителей ('umm').

範例: Yes, I did. My father at first refused to buy one because he thought I was too young, but a few months later he finally bought me a small red bike. I was so happy and spent every afternoon learning to ride it in the park.

建議: Идея выражена, но предложения содержат ошибки в числе существительных и глагольных формах, повторения и неясные фразы ('other things like this', 'sitting in telephone'). Нужно использовать точную лексику и связки (for example, instead of, because) и привести конкретные примеры почему велосипеды популярны (здоровье, экономия, транспорт). Сократите до 2–3 предложений и избегайте повторов.

範例: Yes, they are quite popular. Many children and adults use bikes for fun and short trips because cycling is healthy and cheap. For example, parents often take their kids to parks on bikes instead of letting them stay indoors with their phones.

× Of course and I remember how my dad didn't want to bought it for me and I was so sad.

✓ Of course, and I remember how my dad didn't want to buy it for me, and I was so sad.

The error is using the past-tense form 'bought' after the auxiliary did (didn't). After did/didn't the base form of the verb should be used, so use 'buy'. Also add commas for clarity.

× So he. Umm, he bought me bike after it.

✓ So later he bought me a bike.

The original contains fragmented speech and missing article. 'Bought me bike' lacks the article 'a', and 'after it' is unclear; use 'later' to indicate sequence. Combine fragments into one complete sentence.

× He thought that I was so too much young for it but.

✓ He thought that I was too young for it, though.

The phrase 'so too much young' is incorrect word order and redundant modifiers. Use the standard adverbial modifier 'too young'. Add a conjunction or adverb 'though' to finish the thought.

× Yes, I think they are because a lot of child in our country love it.

✓ Yes, I think they are because a lot of children in our country love them.

'A lot of' requires a plural noun: 'children' not 'child'. Pronoun agreement: 'bikes' are plural so refer to them as 'them' not 'it'. Also 'a lot of children... love them.' ensures subject-verb agreement.

× They love ride the bikes and other things like this and I think it's really so good then just sitting in telephone or just something like this.

✓ They love riding bikes and other activities like this, and I think it's much better than just sitting on the phone or doing something like that.

After 'love' use the -ing form: 'love riding' not 'love ride'. Use plural 'bikes' without 'the' for general meaning. 'So good then' is incorrect comparison; use 'much better than'. 'Sitting in telephone' is wrong preposition and noun choice; correct is 'sitting on the phone'. 'Just something like this' is vague; 'doing something like that' is more natural.