分享— Part 1 評分報告

建議: 回答は質問に直接答えていますが、表現が繰り返されており、自然さに欠けます。また、文法的な誤り（"when I was a little"は不自然）や冗長な部分があります。より自然で簡潔な表現を心がけ、文法の正確さを向上させましょう。

範例: Yes, my parents taught me to share with my sister when we were children. Since we lived in a small house, we had to share a room, which helped me learn the importance of sharing.

建議: 回答が途中で終わっており、意味が伝わりにくいです。また、繰り返しや言い淀みがあり、内容が不明瞭です。文を完結させ、具体的な理由や効果を明確に述べることで、より効果的な回答になります。

範例: I like to share expensive items that I cannot afford alone, such as cars or large houses. Sharing these helps me save money and use resources more efficiently.

建議: 内容は理解できますが、文法の誤りや不自然な表現（"I'm filthy"は不適切）があります。また、文が途中で終わっており、回答が不完全です。より自然な表現と文の完結を意識しましょう。

範例: I believe personal items like bottled water and underwear are not suitable for sharing because it can feel unhygienic and uncomfortable.

建議: 回答は質問に答えていますが、文法の誤りや不自然な表現（"many people are many, you make use of them"）があります。より明確で自然な表現を使い、文法の正確さを向上させましょう。

範例: Recently, I have been sharing a large copy machine with my colleagues at work. Since it is expensive, sharing it makes it more practical for everyone.

建議: 回答は内容的に良いですが、最後の文が途中で終わっており、やや冗長な部分もあります。文を完結させ、より簡潔に表現すると良いでしょう。

範例: I usually share good news with my family because they always support and encourage me. For instance, when I achieve a long-term goal, they celebrate and motivate me to keep going.

建議: 回答が不明瞭で、繰り返しや文法の誤りが多いです（"makes makes my friends feel envious, envied as envied me"など）。意味を明確にし、簡潔で正確な表現を心がけましょう。

範例: It depends on the news. I try to share good news that won't make my friends feel jealous, so I choose carefully what to tell them.

× When I was a little, I lived in a small house, so my parents told me told me to share the room with my sister.

✓ When I was little, I lived in a small house, so my parents told me to share the room with my sister.

The phrase 'when I was a little' is incorrect because 'little' is an adjective and needs a noun to modify. The correct expression is 'when I was little' meaning 'when I was young'. Also, the repetition 'told me told me' is a typographical error and should be corrected to a single 'told me'.

× I would like to share with the material that is too expensive for me to buy, for example, copy machines, cars, uh, large houses. By doing so, by doing so, I can spend, I can.

✓ I would like to share materials that are too expensive for me to buy, for example, copy machines, cars, and large houses. By doing so, I can save money.

The phrase 'share with the material' is incorrect; 'material' should be pluralized to 'materials' to match the context (plural things). Also, 'that is' should be 'that are' to agree with the plural 'materials'. The sentence is incomplete and repetitive; it should be completed for clarity. 'By doing so, I can save money' is a clearer expression. The repeated phrase 'by doing so' is redundant and should be removed.

× I think personal goods that like bottled water, underwear are not suitable for sharing.

✓ I think personal goods like bottled water and underwear are not suitable for sharing.

The phrase 'that like bottled water' is incorrect; 'that' is unnecessary here. Also, 'bottled water, underwear' should be connected with 'and' to list items properly. The phrase 'personal goods like bottled water and underwear' correctly lists examples.

× If I share those things with others, I feel uncomfortable and I'm filthy.

✓ If I share those things with others, I feel uncomfortable and dirty.

The word 'filthy' is too strong and usually describes something very dirty or morally bad. 'Dirty' is more appropriate to describe feeling unclean after sharing personal items. Also, 'I'm filthy' is less natural than 'I feel dirty' in this context.

× In my workplace, I share a big copy machine with other colleagues. It is indispensable for my workplace because many people are many, you make use of them.

✓ In my workplace, I share a big copy machine with other colleagues. It is indispensable because many people use it.

The phrase 'many people are many, you make use of them' is incorrect and unclear. It should be corrected to 'many people use it' to express that many people use the copy machine. Also, 'them' is incorrect because the subject is singular 'copy machine'.

× It is expensive for individual to buy those kind of things.

✓ It is expensive for an individual to buy those kinds of things.

The word 'individual' needs an article 'an' before it. Also, 'those kind of things' should be pluralized to 'those kinds of things' to agree in number.

× I like to share my good news with my family members because they always support me and cheer for me.

✓ I like to share my good news with my family members because they always support me and cheer me on.

The phrase 'cheer for me' is understandable but 'cheer me on' is the more natural and idiomatic expression in English when referring to encouraging someone.

× They feel very happy when I achieve something important for me.

✓ They feel very happy when I achieve something important to me.

The phrase 'important for me' is less natural than 'important to me' when expressing personal significance.

× For example, when I reach a goal that I have been working with for a long time, they celebrate with me and encourage me to.

✓ For example, when I reach a goal that I have been working on for a long time, they celebrate with me and encourage me.

The correct preposition with 'working' in this context is 'on' not 'with'. Also, the sentence ends abruptly with 'encourage me to.' It should end simply with 'encourage me' or be completed with an infinitive verb.

× If I want to share with good news with my friends, it's sometimes on makes makes my friends feel envious, envied as envied me.

✓ If I want to share good news with my friends, sometimes it makes my friends feel envious of me.

The phrase 'share with good news' is incorrect; it should be 'share good news'. The phrase 'it's sometimes on makes makes' is a repetition and incorrect; it should be 'sometimes it makes'. The phrase 'envied as envied me' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'envious of me'.