分享— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Make the response more grammatical, concise and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples using correct grammar and linking words. Avoid repetition and irrelevant words.

範例: Yes — my parents taught me to share from an early age. For instance, I grew up with a sister, so we regularly shared toys and took turns using my family iPad. Because of this, I learned to negotiate turns and respect each other’s belongings.

建議: Clarify the condition and use correct pronouns and tense. Use linking words like 'if' and 'but' correctly, and give one clear example of an item you would lend and one you wouldn't.

範例: It depends on who asks. If a close friend asks, I’m happy to lend things like clothes or books because I trust them. However, if a stranger asks, I usually hesitate and only lend small, inexpensive items.

建議: Be direct and avoid unclear or informal phrases. State the item clearly and give a short reason. Avoid irrelevant or confusing comments.

範例: I think personal relationships, such as boyfriends, are not suitable for sharing because they involve emotions and commitment. Similarly, very personal items like underwear or private documents should not be shared.

建議: Use past tense correctly and add a brief reason and outcome. Begin with a clear topic sentence, then give one supporting detail and result.

範例: Yes — I lent my backpack to a friend last week because she didn’t have a suitable bag and was in a hurry. As a result, she was able to carry her books to class and returned it the next day.

建議: Make the answer more fluent and concise. State the person first, then give a specific reason and an example of the kind of news you would share.

範例: I would share good news with my mother first because she supports my plans and celebrates my achievements. For example, if I passed an important exam, she’d be the first person I’d call to tell her.

建議: Be specific and avoid repetition. Start with a topic sentence about the types of news, then give one clear example with brief details and why you told your friends.

範例: I usually share everyday, casual news with friends, such as recent purchases. For instance, I recently bought a small fruit-shaped bag that fits my phone — I told them because it’s cute and practical for going out.

× I think it's a really common situation when you have a siblings.

✓ I think it's a really common situation when you have siblings.

Use plural 'siblings' without an article after 'have'. 'A siblings' is incorrect because 'a' requires a singular noun. Remove 'a' to make the noun plural and grammatically correct.

× For example, I have a sister so we always need to share our toys or at the time I have an iPad, so we have to share iPad and close everything with my sisters.

✓ For example, I have a sister, so we always need to share our toys; for instance, when I have an iPad, we have to share the iPad and other things with my sisters.

Multiple issues: missing commas and articles, and inconsistent singular/plural. 'share iPad' needs the definite article 'the iPad' or 'my iPad'. Clarify and use consistent noun forms ('toys', 'the iPad'). Also use punctuation to separate ideas.

× If uh, is the person borrow something to me from me, Is my friends, my best friends, I will lend you all the things she can borrow from me.

✓ If the person borrowing something from me is my friend or my best friend, I will lend them anything they can borrow from me.

Pronoun and verb form errors: use 'the person borrowing' (gerund) and correct pronouns: 'them' is gender-neutral instead of mixing 'you' and 'she'. 'Is my friends' is incorrect agreement; use singular 'is my friend' or restructure as above.

× But if it's the strangers they want to uh, ask me to lend him. I need to think about it.

✓ But if strangers ask me to lend them something, I need to think about it.

Wrong articles and pronoun agreement: 'the strangers' is unnecessary; use plural 'strangers'. Use 'lend them' not 'lend him' when referring to plural 'strangers'. Also simplify sentence structure.

× What kind of things are not suitable for sharing?

✓ What kinds of things are not suitable for sharing?

Use plural 'kinds' when asking about multiple categories. The original is understandable but 'What kinds of things' is more natural and grammatically precise.

× I thought it's really ridiculous, but the most things not suitable for sharing, I think is the boyfriends.

✓ I think it's really ridiculous, but the things that are least suitable for sharing are boyfriends.

Tense and structure: 'I thought it's' mixes past and present. Use consistent present tense 'I think'. 'the most things not suitable' is awkward; use 'the things that are least suitable' and plural agreement 'are boyfriends'.

× Yes, I I don't think it's the things you can share with and something similar to it is the friends, because in in my I always failed genius.

✓ Yes, I don't think they are things you can share, and something similar is friends, because in my experience I often fail at this.

Many errors: pronoun 'they' refers to 'boyfriends'. Remove redundant words and correct 'in my experience' for clarity. 'failed genius' is nonsensical; likely intended 'I often fail at this'.

× Oh yeah, I share my backpack to my friends because she didn't have a suitable backpack and didn't have time to buy.

✓ Oh yeah, I shared my backpack with my friend because she didn't have a suitable one and didn't have time to buy one.

Use past tense 'shared' to match 'didn't have'. Use preposition 'with' instead of 'to'. 'my friends' vs 'she' inconsistency: use singular 'my friend' if referring to one person. Use pronoun consistency and replace repeated 'backpack' with 'one'.

× Who is the first person you would like to share good news with?

✓ Who is the first person you would like to share good news with?

This sentence is already correct; no change needed. It appropriately uses modal 'would like' and the structure is natural.

× Of course is my family, especially my mother because I always have a plan when I do something and if I succeed I I thought my mom would really want to be the one. I first share the good news with her.

✓ Of course it's my family, especially my mother, because I always have a plan when I do something, and if I succeed, I think my mom would really want to be the first person I share the good news with.

Pronoun and tense consistency: use 'it's' contraction, remove duplicated 'I', use present 'I think' for habitual belief, and place 'first' before 'share' for correct word order.

× What kind of news do you share with your friends?

✓ What kind of news do you share with your friends?

This question is correct as is; present simple is appropriate for habitual actions.

× Like I buy something new, for example, uh, recently I buy a new, new bag.

✓ For example, recently I bought a new bag.

Use past tense 'bought' for a recent completed action and avoid repeating 'new'. 'Recently' with past tense 'bought' is natural.

× It's really adorable. It's the fruit shape.

✓ It's really adorable. It's fruit-shaped.

Use the adjective form 'fruit-shaped' to describe the bag's shape. 'The fruit shape' is unnatural; hyphenated compound adjective is correct.

× I thought it's really, really cute and it's a bag.

✓ I think it's really, really cute and it's a bag.

Tense inconsistency: use present 'I think' for current opinion instead of 'I thought' which is past. Keep tense consistent within the statement.

× It can uh, pack my cell phone. I can bring it really conveniently.

✓ It can hold my cell phone, so I can carry it very conveniently.

Use the correct verb 'hold' for containers rather than 'pack'. 'Bring it really conveniently' is awkward; use 'carry it very conveniently'. Improve word choice and adverb placement.