假期— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Your answer is a bit unclear and somewhat repetitive. Try to start with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, then add specific details using linking words to improve coherence. Avoid redundancy and keep your answer concise within 5 sentences.

範例: I went shopping last Sunday during my holiday. It was a busy but enjoyable day at the market. I bought clothes, groceries, and some makeup products. I find shopping peaceful and it helps me relax and feel happy.

建議: Your answer addresses the question but could be clearer and more structured. Start with a direct statement, then explain with specific reasons using linking words. Avoid repeating similar ideas and keep sentences concise.

範例: Yes, I like holidays because they are fun and exciting. They give me a chance to relax after a busy week. Also, holidays allow me to spend quality time with my family and loved ones.

建議: Your answer has good content but lacks clarity and has some grammatical errors. Use complete sentences and linking words to connect ideas logically. Be specific and avoid incomplete sentences.

範例: My favourite public holiday is Idul Fitr. It is exciting because we receive gifts and money, and guests visit our house. We share sweets and greetings with family and friends, which makes the day very joyful.

建議: Your answer is somewhat confusing and contains unclear phrases. Try to organize your ideas clearly, use correct vocabulary, and avoid filler words. Provide specific activities you do on holidays in a logical order.

範例: My holidays are usually busy. I often do house chores like cleaning and cooking. I also organize my clothes and drawers. After that, I relax by watching videos on my phone.

建議: Your answer shows good ideas but is a bit repetitive and unclear. Use simpler sentences and link your ideas clearly. Avoid repeating similar phrases and focus on expressing your thoughts concisely.

範例: Yes, I like spending my day at home depending on my mood. If I feel calm, I prefer to go outside for something exciting. But if the weather is hectic, I enjoy staying home peacefully without disturbances.

建議: Your answer is relevant but contains some unclear words and repetition. Use precise vocabulary and structure your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details using linking words.

範例: I prefer a leisurely holiday because everyone deserves a peaceful break. Holidays are a time to rest and clear your mind from daily stress. Therefore, staying calm and relaxed is important during holidays.

建議: Your answer is thoughtful but a bit wordy and repetitive. Try to express your ideas more clearly and concisely, using linking words to connect your points logically.

範例: It depends on my mood. If my previous week was calm, I prefer an exciting holiday. However, if I had a busy week, I choose a peaceful holiday to relax and recharge.

× So I went for shopping on my last holiday last week on Sunday.

✓ So I went shopping on my last holiday last week on Sunday.

The phrase 'went for shopping' is incorrect because 'go shopping' is the correct collocation. The verb 'go' is followed directly by the gerund 'shopping' without the preposition 'for'.

× It was really a quiet hectic day because it was really fun.

✓ It was really a quite hectic day because it was really fun.

The adverb 'quiet' is incorrect here; the correct adverb is 'quite' to modify 'hectic'. Also, 'quiet hectic' is a contradictory phrase; 'quite hectic' means 'very hectic'.

× In market.

✓ In the market.

The phrase 'In market' is incomplete and lacks an article. The correct phrase is 'In the market' because 'market' is a singular countable noun requiring the definite article 'the' when referring to a specific place.

× I have bought many clothes, grocery items, also some makeup products, umm.

✓ I bought many clothes, grocery items, and also some makeup products.

The present perfect tense 'have bought' is less appropriate here because the speaker is referring to a specific past event (last holiday). The simple past 'bought' fits better. Also, 'and' is needed before 'also' for correct conjunction.

× Moreover, I also like shopping because it is really peaceful for me and also good for health for being happy.

✓ Moreover, I also like shopping because it is really peaceful for me and good for my health and happiness.

The phrase 'good for health for being happy' is awkward and incorrect. It should be 'good for my health and happiness' to clearly express the benefits. Also, 'and also' is redundant; 'and' suffices.

× If you spend your holiday as peaceful, calm and give time to yourself because you have spent very hectic week.

✓ If you spend your holiday peacefully and calmly and give time to yourself because you have spent a very hectic week.

Adjectives 'peaceful' and 'calm' should be changed to adverbs 'peacefully' and 'calmly' to modify the verb 'spend'. Also, 'a very hectic week' requires the article 'a' before 'very hectic week'.

× So you have to be focused on yourself, focus on your family, spend time with your loved ones.

✓ So you have to focus on yourself, focus on your family, and spend time with your loved ones.

The phrase 'be focused on yourself' is less natural than 'focus on yourself'. Also, the list should include 'and' before the last item for correct conjunction.

× It's really exciting because there are so much gifts, money and also guests came to my house.

✓ It's really exciting because there are so many gifts, money, and also guests who come to my house.

'Much' is used with uncountable nouns; 'many' is correct for countable nouns like 'gifts'. Also, 'guests came' should be 'guests who come' or 'guests come' to maintain present tense consistency.

× We also go we share sweets and gifts with each other, There's many greetings and also so much fun with my cousins, friends and also I spend time with my loved ones.

✓ We also share sweets and gifts with each other. There are many greetings and also so much fun with my cousins and friends, and I spend time with my loved ones.

The sentence is run-on and lacks proper punctuation. 'We also go we share' is incorrect; it should be 'We also share'. 'There's many greetings' should be 'There are many greetings' because 'greetings' is plural.

× Usually my holidays are really busy and I don't have time to give to my extra calico activities like things, sports or doing, uh, things that I like like cleaning, cooking.

✓ Usually my holidays are really busy and I don't have time to devote to my extra-curricular activities like sports or doing things that I like, such as cleaning and cooking.

The phrase 'give to my extra calico activities' is incorrect; it should be 'devote to my extra-curricular activities'. Also, 'like things, sports or doing, uh, things that I like like cleaning, cooking' is unclear and redundant; it should be clarified and simplified.

× But I usually do my work, clean my drawers, clothes, let's do some house cures and spend the rest of my day with watching my phone move.

✓ But I usually do my work, clean my drawers and clothes, do some house chores, and spend the rest of my day watching videos on my phone.

'Let's do some house cures' is incorrect; it should be 'do some house chores'. Also, 'spend the rest of my day with watching my phone move' is awkward; 'spend the rest of my day watching videos on my phone' is clearer and grammatically correct.

× Yes, I do like to spend my day at home but it depends on my mood, at what mood I am going through.

✓ Yes, I do like to spend my day at home but it depends on my mood, on what mood I am going through.

The phrase 'depends on my mood, at what mood' is incorrect; the preposition 'at' should be 'on' to match 'depends on'.

× If I'm really peaceful and calm, so I really want some exciting day to spend outside.

✓ If I'm really peaceful and calm, I really want to spend an exciting day outside.

The conjunction 'so' is unnecessary after 'if' clause. Also, 'some exciting day to spend outside' is awkward; 'to spend an exciting day outside' is clearer.

× If it's holiday and if like the weather is everything is going so fast hectic.

✓ If it's a holiday and if the weather is hectic and everything is going so fast.

The phrase is fragmented and unclear. 'If it's holiday' needs the article 'a'. 'If like the weather is everything is going so fast hectic' is ungrammatical; it should be 'if the weather is hectic and everything is going so fast'.

× Uh, yes, I do prefer lately because I think that everyone has the right to spend their holidays in a quite peaceful environment rather than being busy.

✓ Uh, yes, I do prefer leisure because I think that everyone has the right to spend their holidays in a quite peaceful environment rather than being busy.

The word 'lately' is incorrect here; the intended word is likely 'leisure' or 'leisurely'. 'Lately' refers to recent time, not a type of holiday.

× Because holiday means to take off and take rest from everything that is going through in your head on each single day.

✓ Because a holiday means taking time off and resting from everything that is going on in your head every single day.

'Take off and take rest' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'taking time off and resting'. Also, 'going through in your head' is awkward; 'going on in your head' is better. 'Each single day' is better as 'every single day'.

× It depends upon my mood that what I am going through that if my previous week is peaceful, so I really want an exciting holiday.

✓ It depends upon my mood and what I am going through. If my previous week is peaceful, I really want an exciting holiday.

The sentence is a run-on with incorrect conjunctions. 'That what I am going through that if' is ungrammatical. It should be split into two sentences with proper conjunctions.

× But if my previous week is quite hectic and busy, so I really want a peaceful holiday to make me manageable, make everything's work normally in my head, in my body, in my everything going through.

✓ But if my previous week is quite hectic and busy, I really want a peaceful holiday to help me manage and make everything work normally in my head, body, and everything else going on.

The conjunction 'so' is unnecessary after 'but if' clause. 'Make me manageable' is incorrect; it should be 'help me manage'. 'Make everything's work' is ungrammatical; it should be 'make everything work'.